“Prosperity knits a man to the world. He feels that he is finding his place in it, while really it is finding its place in him.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters
As a girl in this world, growing up I was always feeling insecure.
One of the best pieces of wisdom I’ve ever heard told is this: Nobody really cares that much about you.
Sounds harsh, but it’s so comforting to me.
Nobody truly cares about how you look, what you’re doing, what grade you made, what awards you receive. They don’t ruminate on what you said two weeks ago. They could talk about it, but that’s most likely their own insecurity shining through. Because they don’t really care.
There’s a lens in all of us that’s unique, but the same- our worldview and perceptions. It’s human nature to make our worldview revolve around our favorite topic- which is us.
K admit it, we love to talk about ourselves. Almost every little decision we make keeps in mind what someone else might say, think, or do about it afterwards.
“All the world’s a stage and all the men and women are merely players.”
A lot of the time I have to make a conscious effort to just listen. To just stop talking and thinking about myself for one minute and to take in someone else’s thoughts. I admire so much the people who can do this really well.
This is not all to say we don’t have genuine moments and connections with people. My point is that it’s the people who matter that will care about your accomplishments and listen to your concerns, because they love you. Not for any other reason. If someone cares deeply otherwise it’s because they are jealous and insecure like the rest of us.
While I think it’s probably impossible to rid ourselves of all insecurity, it’s so freeing to let go of as much as we can. Trading in superficial conversation and appearances for meaningful relationships is one of the best things I could’ve ever done for myself. And I still work at it.
There will always be that person who is smarter, prettier, funnier, nicer, more likable, and has a better job or goes to a better school than you do. To me, that’s become a good thing, because I don’t feel as much of a need to live up to something so unattainable.
We’ll never be able to measure up to the expectations we put in other people’s heads about ourselves. I think it’s important to try and find a new forefront for our minds- one in which we decide to consciously empathize with someone else.
Being the perfect cocktail of physically perfect and “emotionally unavailable” is a waste.
Care for other people.
You cannot take what you’ve earned in this world to the grave. Nothing and no one is going with you but your soul.
Is that scary, or comforting?
“I have seen all things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, like chasing the wind.” -Ecclesiastes 1:14